January 22, 2005

Sex: What's a Lifestyle?

Let me get this straight, so to speak.

Gays should not be allowed to marry, because that would be promoting their "lifestyle". I've always thought that part of the "lifestyle" that moralists used was their sexual proclivity. But if marriage promotes monogamy, wouldn't that be a good thing?

Anyhow, I've tried to figure out what it is about homosexuals that shows a very distinct lifestyle from, say, my own. I'm using those folks around me who I know are gay, instead of those whom I merely suspect are gay. Sounds fair to me, so here we go:

Them: about half own or partially own businesses.
Me: been fired a few times.

Them: regular vacations, lots of toys (boats, rear-projection tvs)
Me: I got my bike! Of course, it's my only vehicle...

Them: a few single, others in monogamous long-term relationships.
Me: was single, now in long term relationship.

Them: most have kids and grandkids.
Me: way too self-centred for children. And the wife said no.

Them: one stopped by family from visiting her terminally ill lover.
Me: avoided visiting one terminally ill grandfather if possible.

Them: recently at dinner party where guest told lots of fag jokes.
Me: insults more personalized. (I appreciate that sort of thing.)

Okay, so there are some differences in "lifestyle" between them and me; but there are as many differences between the gays I know. Frankly, I don't see what difference the gay couples being married is going to make to my life, other than that awkwardness when a couple you know divorce and you try to stay friends with both parties.

The Premier of Alberta, Ralph Klien, has been trying to gain support for a "third way" (showing socialist roots, Ralph?) to get legalization for gay marriage, just not call it marriage.

"Equal, but Different" anyone?

This makes them second class citizens, and I just don't accept that definition being applied to someone in my country. For those of you who still think being gay is a choice, here's a little test:

Think of your perfect mate. What are the attributes that compose this ideal person? Can you picture falling in love with that person if they were the same sex you are? Can you imagine living with, and quite happily spending the rest of your life with, anyone of the same sex? And you can't give the usual "But I was really drunk at the time" excuse, either! This is for life, remember.

Most of the arguements I've seen against gay marriage are religon based, and that's understandable, but the Suprems Court of Canada has made it very clear that no church or temple or indeed any faith will be forced to perform unwanted ceremonies. None. It's when the arguements wander away from theology where things get really, really silly. The value of marriage to society at large is a recurring favorite, as if suddenly hetrosexual marriage will end if gays can get hitched. The best part of such arguements is that they support such concepts as pre-arranged marriage and forced marriage "for societys good", and that's just goofy.


posted by Thursday at 11:39 am


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