“Okay, Here’s The Plan…”

We’ve got one shot at this, gang. We’ll have to find the right opportunity, or else manufacture it.

You’re kidding, right? We’re really going after… that?

Yep. That’s the challenge.

Look, this is ridiculous! We have serious consequences if this goes wrong – potentially far worse than anything we’ve tried before. All for some ego-inflating title!

Best Thieves in the World, bub. Treat it with respect: with that title comes the heat, and the jobs. Anyone here so scared of one that they don’t want the other?

Didn’t think so. Let’s got on with it then, shall we? Assets?

Depends on how much we want to spend, really. We’ve got a few contacts close to the target, of course, but no one that could pull this off. We’ve got us, of course, and I don’t need to say how valuable our respective skills are… Otherwise, several one-use cracks – but I don’t see how to apply them with any certainty.

Technology’s out. This isn’t just money we’re after.

Agreed. It’s going to have to be a Human Resources affair, rather than Industrial.

That comes to me. He’s a man, yes; but I don’t see an opportunity to approach him any time soon.

What events are on his dance card?

Little of use. At public events he’s always with his wife, of course; and the media surrounding him makes him more cautious than ever. Especially given his lowering fortunes.

True – he doesn’t need another PR disaster.

…But he could use a nice image-raiser…

Gentlemen, and lady: I believe we have our point of entry. A morale-raising event is going to happening somewhere – let’s find it.

Not easy. His security is through the roof for every outside occasion, even with hand-picked attendees.

We need somewhere he actually meets people.

Doesn’t happen.

Might.

Get serious: everywhere, and I mean everywhere, has a cordon of security even if he stays behind a podium on a stage fifty feet from the crowds.

Tell me what you have.

Here, there’s no chance – as was so astutely pointed out. Internationally, however…

Ha! He has an even worse reputation there!

Cool it, you. Keep talking.

Thank you. As I was saying, he seems to have a devoted following in Albania.

…

Where?

Albania.

...

Devoted?

Devout. Worshipful.

Is he going anywhere near there any time soon?

He’s touring Europe after the G8 Summit next year, and that’s including Italy and Bulgaria…

Sounds good enough to me. Who do we have in place that can shift the itinerary?

Make it a stop over – a short visit to let the man be greeted by cheering throngs…

I’m on it.

One crowd, coming up.

So, gentle readers – did they succeed? Will this notorious gang be hailed as the greatest thieves in the underworld? There are answers here… and here.