May 18, 2007

There May Be A Flaw In Your Reasoning

So at the second Republican debate, where once again Giuliani proved he never should have had control of New York, never mind be made president, moderator/lickspittle Brit Hume asked what is clearly the stupidest question in the history of political debates:

"Three shopping centers near major U.S. cities have been hit by suicide bombers. Hundreds are dead, thousands injured. A fourth attack has been averted when the attackers were captured off the Florida coast and taken to Guantanamo Bay, where they are being questioned. U.S. intelligence believes that another larger attack is planned and could come at any time.

First question to you, Senator McCain. How aggressively would you interrogate those being held at Guantanamo Bay for information about where the next attack might be?"

The response from Senator McCain was solid, and the rest were predicatable (Yes! Yes! Oh, God, YES!!!) and audience approved, but only one reply had the true spirit of the question in mind:

"I'm looking for Jack Bauer at that time, let me tell you." Thanks, Tom. He's looking for good reason, too: a fictional situation demands a solution from a fictional character.

There are other problems with this situation: what if, for instance, the captured terrorist is Mel Gibson? Man, you could torture him for days and not get a damned thing! Tell you what: let's just put 300 Spartans on every flight: that'll keep everyone safe!

In reality, the fantasy circumatance that Hume describes just doesn't happen. Ever. And all pretending it will happen does is provide another excuse for the fanatical fear junkies to hyperventilate themselves into an adrenal rush.


posted by Thursday at 3:15 pm


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